I wouldn't be surprised if you wanted to know 'the how'.
I get it. I used to want to know 'the how' too.
But the truth is, there isn't really a how that I can teach you, which will definitely work for you. What I can teach you, more than anything else, is to quiet down and listen for your own wisdom.
As a coach, I love the idea of having a technique or a tool. In essence, these work. For however long they do, until they don't anymore.
Because tools and techniques live outside of you. They will ALWAYS come from the outside in, and at some point, when you can't show up to uphold all the construct of your life you've put together to function at high performance, something in your life will fall apart.
I've seen it over and over again, not only in my own life, but in the life of others.
Take Bernadette for example.
A beautiful woman with a bright smile.
Life looks great on her.
Yet, the more she listens to others, the more her life falls apart.
At first, it's her relationship.
Her partner is not growing with her. She focuses on her business.
Then her business becomes stagnant. She wants more money so she works on the money mindset.
Her inability to break through, is chalked off to 'growing' or 'resistance'.
So she pushes a bit harder... because she's determined and undeterred.
Now, her health is slipping. She has adrenal fatigue. And her coach tells her to get over it... because after all, it's all in her mind.
Slowly, or maybe not even so slowly, her life as she knew it is slipping.
How is this happening? After all, she's doing all the right things.
What is not being taken into account here, is that perhaps she's in an evolving phase of her life, and as Dr. Wayne Dyer says, 'what works in the morning of your life, does not work in the afternoon of your life'.
What I've come to discover from personal experience is that when we ignore our wisdom, we cannot even notice the shift from the morning of our life to the afternoon of our life.
If I am to notice it and to perceive it and to know it, then I better damn well be tuned inwards... and stop listening to all of the external advice.
I'm not advocating that you not listen to the wisdom or advice of others... however, I am absolutely standing for the idea that you listen to your own first and foremost. The guidance of others is there to offer you a possibility, not the path you are meant to take.
So, what do you do?
You begin to tune in.
Listen. Shhh... Listen again.
What insight is rising up from inside of you?
What piece of wisdom is yours... and yours alone, gently guiding you to your true nature?
Have you lost touch with it?
When Bernadette came to me, she was hopeful. She had gotten just enough of a glimpse to see the possibility of her life for herself. That's what hope is by the way. It offers you just enough for you to see a possibility, and then it's up to you to take the step.
You may have heard the cliché that 'hope is not a strategy'. It's not, yet it still serves a profound purpose. Hope is like a bridge you cross over. Or a tunnel you go through, deep within the mountains.
I digress a bit, as I remember these very long tunnels in the Alps in Switzerland, where I grew up as a little girl. These tunnels could easily be 1km or more long. You would be in the dark for a while, until you saw the light on the other side.
That's what hope is.
Then, the journey is still up to you.
If you've been feeling unsure, uncertain, insecure, unknowing, uncommitted, unclear and/or stagnant, then perhaps you've been ignoring your own vision and wisdom for longer than necessary.
Bernadette's transformation is a gift to witness.
It's not even such hard work. Both of us have worked much, much harder in our lives and in past careers than we are doing now. It's trusting the shift from the outside in to the inside out model of living which requires a leap. The rest is actually quite simple, peaceful, elegant.
I am fortunate to have come across a new understanding of how life occurs for us. Initially, I was a bit timid to bring this to clients. It sort of turned my coaching upside down for a moment (a few months), and yet the commitment lives inside of me that I must share it with you.
For myself and for my clients, very much like Bernadette, life is easier. Calmer. More peaceful. Joyful. Carefree. Fun. There is so much of myself that was lost in pushing, proving, justifying, explaining, and validating my life and my business. I had become a bundle of tools, techniques, and processes, and I was simply exhausted.
At one point I realized I wasn't truly living. I was existing. Repeating. Grasping. Going after.
Getting over adrenal fatigue required both a calmer mind and a calmer life, not just a mindset shift. Mindset did help me tremendously along the way, but the calmer mind I'm speaking of, and which Bernadette now experiences as well, exists in the space before the mindset.
This place, my darling, is where your peace, joy, and exuberant life and business actually live. This is the space from which your own insights (not mine or anybody else's) arise.
I'm excited for you... for that vision still alive in your heart. You see, Bernadette and I did not go create it and go make it happen... instead, we allowed it to surface. So each day, is a little bit different because the new insight is unknown to you until you wake up in the morning. Or until you've had your coffee and taken your children to school. Way more fun to live in the not knowing! Trust me on that one!
Are you curious? Might you want to explore how this inside out understanding can help you right now? You have absolutely nothing to lose, and everything to gain. Not the least of which is yourself!
Ready? Let's talk!
Françoise Everett, MS is a facilitator, feminine leadership coach, author, speaker and lifestyle business owner. She works and supports women entrepreneurs and women who hold leadership positions by unlocking their inner wisdom, feminine power, and hidden richness.